Sunday, April 4, 2010

It’s Time To: Store your winter coats

Why? To make room in your closet so that everything isn’t crushed together, and because seldom-used clothing that sits neglected in the back of your closet, never seeing the light of day (literally), is the perfect breeding ground for clothing-eaters.

Holes in sweaters, in this country, are more likely to come from carpet beetles than clothes moths (carpets being historically made from wool), and actually the larvae of the carpet beetles.  Carpet beetles will eat any animal fibers (wool, silk, suede, fur, feathers) as well as synthetic and plant-based materials (polyester, cotton) that are heavily soiled.  And they are particularly attracted to undisturbed clothing, so anything to be stored over the summer (think warm, humid, and dark) should have proper precautions taken.

So what?  So many of the remedies for moths will not affect carpet beetles.  This is a two-pronged attack: kill any existing eggs that have been laid, and then repel any further insects from laying eggs.

Kill: Clean everything.  There’s a good chance that there are eggs on your stuff right now, and any food particles, stains, body oils, or dead skin on the coat will attract carpet beetles in storage.    Take it to be dry-cleaned (or preferably wet-cleaned) or put it in the washing machine depending on the care instructions.  Dry cleaning kills eggs, as does washing with hot water.  If something can’t be washed in hot water, wash it cold, and then, once it’s completely dry, put it in the dryer on high for about half an hour. 

What about the coat you never even wore this winter?  That means it’s probably been a perfect environment for beetles to lay eggs, because it’s been sitting undisturbed in your closet.  I suggest dry-cleaning it anyway.  If you’re that cranky about it, you can take it out into bright sunshine and brush it with a hard-bristled brush, getting into all the crevices and seams.  And think about getting rid of the coat, or keeping it in deep storage.

Repel: Most natural-chemical repellants, like cedar or lavender, only work against moths and not carpet beetles.  Mothballs are poisonous, smell horrible, react badly with plastic, and only work in a very airtight enclosed space.  You could put your clothing in an airtight plastic container, but any moisture left on the clothing will condense and create mildew.  I suggest using breathable containers, like garment bags or boxes, made from clean cotton (which carpet beetles do not eat), and wrapping the coats in layers of clean cotton. 

Coats can be folded in boxes or hung on padded, heavy-duty hangers.  Stuff any areas that you don’t want crushed, like the shoulders, with tissue paper.

For fur:  Fur needs special attention.  A fur coat should be sent to a specialist for cold storage.  Any fur trim is ideally detachable, and should be sent to cold storage, as well.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Is it time for open-toed shoes yet?

I don’t see it as a Rule, exactly, that one is Not Allowed to wear open-toed shoes in winter.  You should be guided by the weather, and not by the calendar.  But it usually amounts to the same thing:

Since we are Not Allowed to wear stockings with open-toed shoes, if it’s too cold to forgo stockings, it’s too cold for open-toed shoes. 

Not Exceptions:

So-called “sandal-foot” stockings: Sorry, they exist purely to trick you into buying more stockings than you need, especially since these will run more easily than your proper reinforced-toe stockings.

Open-toed stockings:  Ha! Now I’m trying to trick you.  If you are seriously considering stooping to this level just to get a jump on wearing your spring shoes, you need to stop and reexamine your priorities.

Shivering in bare legs: Nothing looks more tasteless than a woman who ought to be wearing stockings but isn’t.  Again, no shoes are that cute—just wait until it’s warmer!

Opaque tights: I guess if you are “making a fashion statement,” and the stockings are truly opaque, and completely matte…  But it still would just look like you’re trying to cheat.

Patience—it’s one of the pillars of Style.

A Millennial Orgasm is a Well-Researched Orgasm

Read all about It.

Research for your pleasure, or his, compiled by data from OrgasmSurvey.com (yes, you can take it!).

[via FastCompany]

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Anti-Monogamists are Dumb, says Science

Promiscuity-pushers love touting science, biology, and evolution in order to degrade the bounds of propriety and the moral fiber of whatever shreds of society are left.

Well, they’re idiots, and you can read the research that says so. (Social Psychology Quarterly is for paying subscribers only, but the head scientist posted the article on his website.)

From the Telegraph:

Dr Kanazawa claims that the correlation between intelligence and monogamy in men has its origins in evolutionary development.

Sexual exclusivity is an “evolutionary novel” quality that would have been of little benefit to early man, who was programmed to be promiscuous, he argues.

The modern world no longer confers such an evolutionary advantage to men who have several sexual partners - but it is only intelligent men are able to shed the psychological baggage of their species and adopt new modes of behaviour.

In other words, men with more big-brain power can overcome the caveman urges of their little brains.

So the next time someone tells you that monogamy is a “hang-up,” you can wish them good luck ditching their “psychological baggage.”

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Delete the Number Already

These new-fangled cell phones, without which us Millennial Ladies could not live, fill our lives with problems heretofore unknown.  There’s the texting (and sexting), there’s the inescapable caller ID.  And then there is the everlasting contacts list. 

Unless you lose your phone (and start one of those ubiquitous – and dangerous – lost-my-phone! Facebook groups), your phonebook is Forever.  Thanks to SIM cards, when you change phones, your phonebook goes right along with you.  Thanks to number-porting, most of us still have the same number we’ve had since we got our first phones.  There is no forgetting or losing a number.  And it takes up no space.  Therein are born the “should I delete his number?” Facebook statuses.  And the answer, I learned the hard way, is YES.

At some point this morning, either one of the times that I dropped my phone, or when I stuck it in my purse without locking the keypad, my phone accidentally dialled an “ex.”  Like, the love-of-my-life one-who-got-away “ex.”  I only realized this several hours later when I went into my call log to make a call.  According to the log, the call lasted for one second – could be one second of ringing, or one second of his going “hello?”

I kind of stressed about it (ie, had a panic attack), and then blocked it out of my mind.

UNTIL HE CALLED BACK this evening.  I was so in shock that I didn’t answer, and he left a hang-up message.  On the advice of a friend that I couldn’t just ignore it, I sent a text back: “whoopsy-daisy I dropped my phone and called you by accident, have a nice life.”  And I got a text back: “who r u.”  Definitely not the best-case scenario.  It’s possible that he’s changed numbers.  Or, since he had a horrifically bad memory, my number’s still in the phone but he’s forgotten my name/who I am.

Anyway, no need to answer, because either it isn’t his number anymore, or, when I bump into him by accident in the city, he won’t associate me with the random call and text he got months before.

But the lesson is clear: Delete The Number.  I have so many of these old guys’ numbers in my phone – from high school, even.  I’ve been watching Hoarders, and have learned that only crazies who are getting evicted live their lives by “Just In Case.”  Just in case what, I need to call him?  Obviously not.  Just in case he’s calling me and I can recognize the caller ID?  Yes, maybe, that would be nice.  But it’s almost as nice to be able to sound genuinely perplexed when I answer the phone, or to text back a “who is this” of my own.  And even nicer: not accidentally, mortifyingly, calling him.

There is no reason to keep the number of a guy that you’re not going to call.  There is no “just in case” worth accidentally calling him (“accidentally” also includes drunk-dialling). 

Delete The Number.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Mingle for a cause, without the Olds

Good food, a chance to dress up, men in ties with their shirts tucked in, and all for the good cause of your choice! 

A charity gala?  Yawn, you say, more like a chance to sign away thousands of dollars to sit around with my parents and grandparents.  Not so!

Many charitable organizations and institutions, realizing that their typical support base is aging and dwindling, are reaching out to younger potential-donors with membership levels or programs specifically for young people (20s and 30s).

Membership is usually tax-deductable (since it’s in essence a donation), so I suggest spending that ten percent of your income that you’ve set aside for charitable donations to get your elbows up against some swankily-dressed charitably-minded young men (like Ethan Hawke!). 

And if you’re not ready to spring for a full membership, sign up for Charity Happenings, a “master calendar” geared toward “young philanthropists” in several cities and listing events either for young people or priced for young people (ie, cheap).

This list is for New York City organizations.  I’m sure big non-profits in other cities have them, too.  Or, suggest one to your favorite organization: they’re always looking for ways to engage us.  (This list is definitely not complete; maybe I’ll update it.)

“We met at the Young New Yorker Winter party in 2004 and were married in September 2006.  Our “very” Young New Yorker, Miles, was born in July 2008—and he loves music, too!” — Loren & Michael Dinger, Young New Yorkers

See you at the Spring Fling!